Being fairly newly retired is proving interesting on a number of fronts. I am sure many of you are also retired and I imagine you may have thought about some of issues I want to talk about.
I think I am right in suggesting that we ‘get’ work, we do something we are paid. There is a rhythm, satisfaction and structure to it, even if you change jobs or careers in your work lifetime. Depending on how we feel about work you maybe counting the days until you stop; or dreading not being able to work anymore. For me it felt like stepping off a cliff and I have been in a sort of free fall ever since.
It’s not a total free fall as I had done my best with the financial planning (a bit of a parachute); but planning is one thing but the reality is no more earned income. This gets mixed up into a bundle of well, how long have I got? What do I want to do? How is my health? Knowing you have less time left than I have already had is sobering.
It’s also part of a scarcity mindset.
I think that when you are working you focus on the work and not these more difficult questions.
Stopping work can make you start to reflect on the more existential questions who am I and what do I want? What will now make my life meaningful?
This is where truth comes in being really honest with yourself; how do I want to ‘spend’ my time and also my money?
The underlying part of this is how do I want to feel?
When we spend money we are often chasing a feeling; “I deserve this, I need to keep up with friends, I want people to think I am successful”. When we start to get really honest with ourselves we can start to feel freer. Not being emotionally honest is time consuming and exhausting. Think about how you feel being invited to a party you don’t want to go to but feel you ‘should’. Compared to when you are really looking forward to something.
Aiming for a neutral calm space, like a fulcrum is a good starting point. We make better decisions if we are not either wildly excited or depressed. Noticing when we do feel on an even keel and what has brought that about. Also cultivating a feeling of abundance, turning thoughts towards plenty. This doesn’t mean going out and buying five pairs of shoes, it’s not an outward collection of stuff.
It’s an inner recognition, a feeling.
I had hours of sleep, the garden both in terms of flower, weed and seed production, peaches in the supermarket! The more we turn our thoughts towards abundance and away from scarcity the more we will see it both within ourselves and our lives. This will tap into that inner calm which is a place we make good decisions from.
We then may feel very rich indeed and not a credit card bill in sight!